sometimes, I even scare myself. and I think with good reason.

BJW1120: hi
Guard143: uh... hi
BJW1120: how are you
Guard143: actually... to tell the truth, horrible.
BJW1120: ohh why
Guard143: I just had a very upsetting interlude with an absolutely huge spider. running across my face. from nowhere.
BJW1120: yuck
Guard143: it was a big brown thing, the kind with thick legs, and it was about the size of a dollar coin. the new ones.
BJW1120: i hate those things
BJW1120: did it bite you
Guard143: yeah, no, but I have a huge case of arachnaphobia... when they're crawling across my face.
BJW1120: lol
Guard143: I eventually brushed it onto my shirt, from which I promptly blew it off onto the ground, and then punished it for running across my face with all eight legs.
Guard143: I smashed it with my foot
Guard143: no more spider, but I most likely will be spending the night in the back seat of my car in the garage.
BJW1120: that pretty evil of you though
BJW1120: that is
Guard143: evil? did you just have a dollar sized creepy spider running across your face?
Guard143: or was that me?
BJW1120: no but you didnt have to kill it
Guard143: don't get me wrong, usually I like to let them out to freedom in the backyard,
BJW1120: lol
Guard143: but panic took over. maybe it was the scary acid flash-back from the Indiana Jones ride at Disneyland
Guard143: just kidding.
BJW1120: good ride
Guard143: so, to answer your question, you caught me at a bad time. sorry. I'm better now.
BJW1120: so what is your name